Not a great day

The darkness is starting to settle on me again.  As usual, I do not know what is causing it.  My whole body is aching; I feel dizzy and disorientated, which is not helping my mood at all.  I can feel my mood slipping and my patience wearing thin to the point of disappearing almost immediately.  This is resulting in my snapping at random and having outbursts towards people who do not deserve it.  That is not to say all my outbursts directed at people are not warranted though.  For example, Vick and I went shopping earlier, and I counted five cars parked in the disabled bays not displaying a badge.  A couple of people were getting out of a car and walking into the shop, and I couldn’t resist.  I said “Do you realise you’ve made my wife walk further now because you are taking up a disabled space? Are …

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More progress and pain

Making it to this weekend has been more comfortable for me than it has been for a long time, and that has to be a plus.  I went to a second counselling session on Thursday, and although I talked a lot, it did seem to go over the same ground.  I know it is only early days, but I don’t know if it is helping.  I guess it helps me get things off my chest, which is always good.  I let myself vent a little recently, and it levelled me out pretty good, so maybe I’m just undervaluing it.  I’d love to hear from anyone who has gone through counselling with any stories, experiences or insights they’d like to share.  I’m new to this and don’t know what to expect.  I guess everyone’s take away from it is different though. We walked Tyrion quite a bit longer this week than …

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Battery is getting low

I think I am starting to feel a dip in my mood.  Over the last few days I’m having to try harder to motivate myself to get up and move.  Not sure what is triggering it this time.  Maybe I am just getting fatigued more easily these days?  I am trying my best not to let it get to me though but it is hard.  I feel like I am running at about 30% all the time.  Always looking to get to the next mile post or the next charging point so to speak.  Not enjoying the journey just enduring it.  That is not how I want to be and for the most part, since I’ve been back, that is not how I have been.  I really hope I’m not slipping again. Recently I began to set up a streaming platform upstairs.  However, my internet upload is currently letting me …

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